Losing You
by Bodukescowgrl
Summary: Martha is working for Lionel and Jonathan doesn't like how close they are and fears that Martha is cheating on him. From the 100 song challenge.
1. Chapter 1

Warnings/Spoilers: Don't own any of the characters and the song is What is this feeling from the play Wicked. Sort of AU and takes place in second season

Based on the song What Is The Feelings from the play Wicked

The argument from earlier that day was still bothering him. Martha told him that Lionel offered her a job. Jonathan knew that Martha wouldn't accept the offer. So when Martha told him she accepted Lionel's offer he was surprised. Martha knew how Jonathan felt about the Luthors so he was confused as to why she would say yes to working for one of them, and Lionel of all people to work for.

This was the first time in over twenty years the two of them went to bed being mad at each other. Martha expected an apology for the way he reacted but he wasn't about to apologize. For what would he apologize for? For being upset that his wife was working for one of the people he disliked the most. There was no way he would apologize for that. As he was falling asleep he thought to himself that tomorrow this will all pass and Martha would realize that she didn't need to work for Lionel and this would all end.

When Jonathan woke up the next morning he was surprised to see Martha already awake and dressed up in a business suit.

"So you really are going to work for Lionel aren't you?"

"Jonathan, don't start again. Not this early in the morning."

"But why do you even need to work for him?"

"Because Jonathan you know we need the money."

"Yes I know we need the money. But I've been working on the farm as much as I can so that you wouldn't have to go to work."

"Jonathan I know you're doing all that you can but I get tired just staying in the house all the time. I really do want to work."

"So then get a job somewhere else. Please just not with Lionel."

"What is your problem with me working for Lionel?"

"You know I don't trust him. I never did."

"Look I'm just working in his office. It's nothing." Martha looked at the time. "I've got to go or I'm going to be late. Jonathan I'll be home later tonight alright?"

Jonathan sighed knowing it was no use she was going to go no matter what. "See you tonight" he said before kissing her goodbye.

Clark came down the stairs for breakfast and saw that his father was looking upset.

"Dad, everything alright?"

"Oh sorry Clark there's breakfast on the table."

"Dad are you sure you're alright? Where's mom?"

"She got a job working for Lionel."

Clark nearly choked on his food. "She's what?"

"You heard right Clark. I'll be fine Clark. You just go to school"

And for the next month everything was the same. Martha would leave to work for Lionel while Jonathan did work on the farm. But then Jonathan started to notice something different. It used to be that he would see Martha every morning before she left. But now she was already gone by the time he went down to the kitchen. And forget when it came to nighttime. For the first few days Jonathan would wait up for Martha. But now she was coming home later and later and Jonathan just stopped waiting up for her so he would be in bed by the time she came home.

Clark was starting to notice things at home just weren't the same. His father never spoke to him about what was going on but Clark sensed it. Jonathan sort of knew that Clark suspected something. The reason he never brought it up was because he didn't know how he could even begin to tell Clark what was on his mind.

_What is this feeling?_

_So sudden and new?_

Not once in the twenty years he was married to Martha did he even think she would cheat on him. But that was then and this is now and he just had a feeling something more than just work was going on between Lionel. Clark kept asking him questions but Jonathan always shrugged them off saying it was nothing. Jonathan sat down on his bed and thought, how do you explain to your son that his parents are growing apart?


	2. Chapter 2

Based on the song: Here is gone by the goo goo dolls

Clark watched his father as he worked out in the barn. Something was going on with his parents and even though his father kept telling him everything was fine, Clark knew better. He remembered how happy his father was and how he would always be smiling while working on the farm. Now all he did was work on the farm and not bothering with anyone. And his mother? He hadn't seen his mother in the longest time. She was hardly home now and Clark was wondering just what happened between his parents that made them act differently.

Jonathan came in after a few hours of working on the farm. Jonathan looked different, not the same father he remembered always being at home.

"Hey dad, is everything alright?"

"Yes son, things are fine. Why do you ask?"

"Well just that, things has seemed different. You don't seem yourself and mom's hardly home now…"

"Clark I don't want you to worry. Your mom is just busy with her new job that's all."

"Dad you don't think that mom and Lionel are…."

"Clark no not at all. Look why don't you go to your room and do your homework. I'll be fine."

Clark agreed and went up to his room. Jonathan hated lying to Clark but he was doing it to protect him as best as he could. Jonathan called up the office and got no answer and when he called Martha's cell phone, all he got was her voicemail. "What's going on with us Martha" he thought to himself. It wasn't like her to ignore one of his phone calls…yet she was.

iAnd we wake up in the breakdown/i

Jonathan fell asleep on the couch and woke up when he heard the front door open. He looked at the clock and saw that it was almost 2am and Martha was just now coming home.

"Jonathan….what are you doing up so late?"

"You can say I was waiting up for you, but I fell asleep. Where were you all this time?"

"Problems at the office, so I had to stay late to fix things up."

"I called the office earlier, no one picked up," Jonathan said.

"That must've been when the phones shut off….sorry about that."

"How about when I called your cell phone, you didn't answer."

"Jonathan I said I was busy, sorry I didn't answer my phone."

Jonathan wasn't buying any of it. He felt with each lie he was losing Martha. "Or have you been too busy with Lionel." He couldn't believe what he just said but at the same time he meant it.

"Jonathan you don't honestly think I'm cheating do you?"

"Well you're hardly here and you're with him more than me. What else am I supposed to think?"

"I can't believe you think I would do that. Don't you trust me?"

"Honestly Martha, I don't trust either of you."

iI thought I lost you somewhere/i

With that Jonathan went upstairs to the bedroom and laid in bed. He didn't trust Martha anymore. He felt like he was losing Martha and that his whole world was crashing in. He decided that tomorrow he would take a drive by the office and she just how close Martha and Lionel had become. 


	3. Chapter 3

Based on the song Un-break my heart by toni braxton

Jonathan woke up early the next morning. He didn't want Clark to sense that anything was wrong so he went out to work in the barn that way Clark would think that everything was back to normal. Before going to school, Clark went over to his dad.

"Hey dad is everything alright? Cause if you want me to I'll stay home today and help."

"No Clark you shouldn't miss school. Everything will be fine trust me."

Clark looked at his father; he knew he was lying to him. He wished he could just find out once and for all what was going on between his parents. For as long as he could remember, everyone told him that his parents were the most loved couple in Smallville. But now he didn't even think his parents loved each other anymore.

Jonathan watched as Clark left for school. He wanted to make sure the Clark wasn't around when he decided to go to Metropolis. He couldn't imagine how he would explain to Clark that he was going to see what his mother was up to.

Later that day Jonathan drove to Metropolis and to Lionel's office. He looked in the parking lot and saw that Martha's car was there. "Good" he thought to himself. "Now I'll just pay a surprise visit to Lionel and Martha."

Jonathan found Lionel's office and was a little bit hesitant before knocking. There was no answer and he knocked again. He turned the knob and the door opened. What he saw was something he did expect to see but was hoping he didn't see it. But there he saw Martha with Lionel.

iUn-break my heart Say you'll love me again Un-do this hurt you caused/i

Jonathan quickly closed the door. All he wanted to do was just get out of that building. He was walking quickly to the exit until he heard someone call for him.

"Dad?" Jonathan turned around surprised to hear Clark's voice.

"Clark why aren't you in school?"

"I was worried about you dad. When I got to school I came back to the farm just in time to see you leaving." Clark looked at his father.

"Dad what's wrong?"

"Nothing Clark. Just go home."

"Dad is it mom?"

"Clark please just get out of here."

"No dad. I want you to tell me what's going on. And why are you here in Lionel's building?"

"Look Clark. I had a feeling that your mother was with Lionel"  
"You mean as in more than just working together right?" Clark asked.

Jonathan nodded. "I decided to come here and see and also hoping that I was wrong."

"But you weren't were you."

"No I wasn't Clark. I walked in on them….." Jonathan couldn't even go on. He wanted to get that image out of his mind.

"So they are having sex?" Clark asked even though he knew the answer.

Clark knew his father was in no condition to drive back home, not after what he saw. After he drove back home with Jonathan, he too obviously was in no mood to go back to school. And Jonathan, after what he just saw, told Clark that it was fine if he just stayed home.

Jonathan went up to the bedroom and stared at his and Martha's wedding picture. He shook his head knowing that he was indeed losing Martha to Lionel. He had his proof now.

iDon't leave me here with these tears Come and kiss this pain away /i

Jonathan laid back on the bed thinking of what was to come next. Martha would be home later that night and he would have to talk to her. But how would he talk to her he wondered. He closed his eyes but soon opened them again. Every time he would close his eyes he would see that disgusting image of his wife, the woman he loved more than anything in this world, with Lionel Luthor. 


	4. Chapter 4

Based on the song Here without you by 3 doors down

Jonathan had fallen asleep long before Martha came home that night. Images of what he had seen kept flashing in his head making him toss and turn all night. Martha came into the room late that night and saw Jonathan having trouble sleeping. She gently shook him to wake him up.

"Jonathan wake up." Jonathan opened his eyes and jumped up when he saw Martha.

"You actually came home?" he asked her.

"Of course I did, why wouldn't I?"

"I'm just surprised you came home after today. Care to tell me what you did today?" Jonathan asked.

"I went to work. I was in the office all day."

Jonathan couldn't believe she was continuing to lie. "Martha, just tell me the truth already."

"I am telling you the truth. I was in the office working all day."

"Cut the crap already. You were having sex with Lionel."

Martha was shocked when Jonathan said that. "What…how…how did you know?"

Jonathan looked down, "I went to the office today and I walked in on you two. I left before you guys noticed I was there."

"You were spying on me?"

"You really have some nerve getting mad at me. You were the one cheating. I have a right to be mad. So how long has it been going on huh?"

"Since I started working for Lionel."

Jonathan looked away from her, she had been cheating on him for months. He didn't even want to sleep in the same room with her so he grabbed his pillow and a blanket, "I'm sleeping on the couch."

The next morning Jonathan woke up and once again Martha wasn't there but Clark was up.

"It's not like you to be up this early Clark."

"Well yea I know, just couldn't sleep."

"Sorry if your mother and I kept you up."

"Oh no you didn't dad don't worry. Dad what's going to happen with you and mom?"

"Honestly Clark, at this point I don't know what's going to happen."

Jonathan went upstairs and the bedroom looked different. He saw that Martha's clothes were out of the closet and all her other stuff was gone. "She left me" was all he could think. He looked around to see if there was a letter left anywhere from Martha confirming what he just thought. He looked down and on the nightstand he saw her wedding ring. He took the ring and put it in his pocket and left to go back downstairs. Clark saw that his father looked like he was going to be sick.

"Dad are you alright? What's wrong?"

"Clark, is there a letter here anywhere from your mother?"

Clark and Jonathan looked around to see if there was any note and Clark found one. "Dad is this what you're looking for?"

Jonathan took the letter and read it while Clark watched for his father's reaction. "Clark…" he put the letter down and took the ring out of his pocket. "Clark your mother left me….to be with Lionel." The news was just too much for Jonathan and he almost collapsed but Clark got him onto the couch in time.

"Dad…you alright?"

"Yea Clark. Everything is just a surprise but at the same time isn't."

"Dad what's going to happen to us?" Jonathan just shrugged. He honestly had no idea what he was going to do anymore. If Martha wanted to be with Lionel, it was her choice. But at the same time Jonathan was going to do all that he could to get her back.

"Clark I don't know for sure what's going to happen but I will do all I can to make us a family again."

After working on the farm for a few hours Jonathan went to rest. He looked at his nightstand and saw his wedding picture.

iA thousand lights had made me colder and I don't think I can look at this the same /i

He remembered that day so well and how happy the two of them were. He fought so hard to win Martha's heart and she chose him, even though her father didn't want her to marry a farmer like him. And now, well now she was with a guy her father would approve of. He looked at his wedding ring and was about to take it off but then he stopped himself. "No I won't give up this easily and I will fight for your love," he said to himself. 


	5. Chapter 5

Based on the song Fall Back Down by Rancid

Disclaimer: Don't own any of the characters and don't own the song this part is based on.

It was five months since that day Martha left and Jonathan never backed down from trying to get Martha back. But with each try came a rejection from Martha, which would hurt Jonathan more and more. Clark hated seeing his father being hurt, especially by his mother. Clark couldn't believe what he was about to tell his father but at the same time he knew he had to tell him in order for his father to stop hurting.

He went out to the barn to help Jonathan out with the work. "Hey dad need any help?"

"No son I'm fine."

"Actually dad I was hoping we could talk."

Jonathan stopped what he was doing, "Sure son, I can use a break. What is it?"

"Well I know that you've been trying to get mom back and each time she says there's no way she's leaving Lionel."

"Don't you worry Clark, I'm not giving up just yet. Your mother will be back and we'll be a happy family again soon."

"Dad I really hate to tell you this but I really don't think she's going to come back."

"Clark, I really am sorry that you're in the middle of this, but I will not let my family fall apart," Jonathan said going back to his work.  
-  
"I've had a bad year, a lot to go through I've been knocked out, beat down, black and blue She's not the one coming back for you She's not the one coming back for you" Fall Back Down by Rancid

That night Jonathan laid in bed and thought about the conversation that he had with Clark earlier that day. Had it gotten that bad that even Clark had given up on the family ever getting back together? Jonathan shook his head, he couldn't give up this easily, he just couldn't. He still loved her. Even after all she had done, he still loved her. 

He looked at his clock and saw it was after two in the morning. Since the day Martha left, sleep seemed to be something Jonathan wasn't getting anymore. It just wasn't the same anymore, alone in the bed. It just seemed so empty. But he had a lot of work to do in the morning and he needed to get some sleep. He closed his eyes hoping sleep would come soon and thinking what if he had to finally realize he needs to move on from Martha.

Short chapter I know sorry lol...please read and review and then I'll start working on the next chapter :) 


	6. Chapter 6

Based on the song Disease by Matchbox 20.

Disclaimer: Don't own any of the characters and don't own the song the story is based on.

Jonathan was still fighting to get Martha back, but she just refused to even listen to him now. Clark kept trying to tell his father that he had to give up on trying to get her back. What Jonathan didn't know was that Clark had went to talk to his mother, hoping that she would listen to him, but that didn't even work. Clark knew that his mother would never come back, she was happy being with Lionel.

Then came the day when Jonathan knew he had to give up and move on. He had gotten a call saying that Martha wanted to divorce him. She apparently wanted to marry Lionel, said she would have a better life with him than she had with Jonathan. When Jonathan got that phone call, he knew he shouldn've have been surprised, yet he was still shocked that she wanted the marriage to be over. Clark saw his father's face as he hung up the phone. "Dad?"

"Clark, son, um...your mother. She wants a divorce."

"Dad...I'm so sorry. I didn't think she would go this far."

"Yea well she did," Jonathan said just ending the conversation there and going to his room.  
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Feels like you made a mistake You made somebodys heart break " Disease by Matchbox Twenty

The divorce was final within a couple of months, it was obvious that Lionel had pulled some strings to make it go through so fast. And in no time it was all over town that Martha and Lionel were soon to be married. Clark was so worried about his father. He knew that when his father found out his mother was going to marry Lionel he was just going to breakdown. But to his surprise his father came into the house acting as if his nothing had happened. Clark knew this wasn't normal and knew that it wouldn't be long before his father would breakdown from what was happening. And he knew that his father would really need him at that time.

You know the deal, want more of the story then read and review. Thans :) 


	7. Chapter 7

Based on the song Tonight I Wanna Cry by Keith Urban

It had months since the divorce was final and Clark was worried about his father. Jonathan had been going on like nothing had happened. Just went back to continue doing his work on the farm. Clark expected his father to be a lot more upset when the divorce was final, but instead all that Jonathan said to him was that it's over and he just had to move on.

Clark knew that Jonathan was bottling up his feelings. He was glad his father had the attitude that he had to move on but still, he hadn't seen his father be really upset. And he was worried that by bottling up his emotions, at some point Jonathan would just breakdown. Clark himself even cried a few times when his parents' divorce was final.  
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jonathan knew deep down he was broken since the divorce. His choice not to show how upset he was came from the fact that he didn't want other people in the town to feel sorry for him. The wedding of Martha and Lionel was all over the news and Jonathan knew he wouldn't be able to escape people feeling for him. But that's just what he didn't want. He didn't want them to feel bad for him. So he decided he would just play it off and not act as upset as he really was.  
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

And it continued like this, Jonathan would just go out and work on the farm and hardly talk to anyone. In fact the only person he would talk to was Clark. 

"There's pictures of you and I on the walls around me The way that it was and could have been surrounds me "

Then one day, hiding his feelings just got to be too much for him. He found in his closet a box of pictures he had put away of him and Martha. He found one particular picture they took of the two of them with Clark. It had been taken the week they had found him. Jonathan took the picture and sat on his bed looking at it. "We were such a happy family" he thought.

"To hell with my pride, let it fall like rain From my eyes Tonight I wanna cry"

Clark was on his way to bed when he saw the door to his father's room opened. He looked in and saw his father sitting on the bed looking at the picture. But then he noticed his father doing something that he hadn't done in a long time. His father was crying. Clark's first thought was that he should go in there and make sure his father was alright. But then he realized that his father had been keeping this in all this time and that a good cry alone was just what he needed.

The End. 


End file.
